Home is Where Again?


My mom and I saw my youngest brother off at the airport this morning. It had been a long time between visits (where does the time go?) and mom was very affected by her baby leaving.

“I told Steve that when Bob (stepdad, who has end-stage COPD) dies, I’m going to move up there near him.”

I looked over at her in surprise. “Uh, you HATE the cold and ice. You have Raynaud’s, and your hands and feet get all purply in the cold.”

“But I can’t stand the heat, either, anymore, and we have 9 months of it!”

“You can turn the A/C on and drive to the store in your car. You have more like 9 months of winter there. You really want to drive around in the ice and snow?”

“Well, I just can’t keep the place up. I might only have a couple of years left before it gets to be too much for me.”

“What’s to keep up? A coat of paint every couple of years? I can do that!” (If she would mention to me that she wanted it done, which she hasn’t.)

“There’s your middle brother, too. I don’t think he’ll ever have a place of his own.  I can go up there, buy a place, and we’ll live together.  It will give him a home.”

I was glad I wasn’t drinking anything so I didn’t snort it out my nose.  My mom is a super Baptist.  She prays loud and long at every meal.  She has bible readings (aloud).  The brother that she is concerned about, the one we (she and I) haven’t seen in years, is a genuinely nice and gentle guy. He’s a carpenter and (very accomplished) tattoo artist.  He has friends in (very) low places.  He is no stranger to illicit substances and is a practicing alcoholic.  I love him to death, but……I just don’t see it happening.  Oh, mercy.  I’d kinda like to be there, though, when she prayed for the souls of him and all of his buddies.  Road trip?

I suggested to her that maybe, just maybe, before she went and put the (paid for) house on the market, she might want to fly up in the winter and give it a trial run for a month or so.  Just in case.

3 Responses

  1. Just exactly where is up yonder?
    Tell her she needs to be near her grand and great grandbabies more, when that sad day comes.

  2. Well….she has grand and great grandbabies up near Kansas City, too. Late, evil, and unlamented stepdad moved them there long after I’d left home, so I have no ties to or familiarity with the place. Sounds kinda icky with winter snow and ice, and summer tornadoes, though.

    Lil’ brothers grew up, settled in there, and same ol’ bastid stepdad moved mom away from there. She hasn’t really lived near my lil’ brothers for over 20 years, and I’m sure her heart yearns for them…..on the other hand, she hated it when she lived there, and her driving isn’t all that anymore here where the roads are flat and straight (although that may just be from lack of practice on anything except rural Georgia roads). The thought of her trying to navigate icy winter streets is pretty frightening.

    Plus, her friends are here, her doctors who know her condition are here, and most of the nurses that work in the doctor’s offices are former coworkers, so she gets excellent medical care. I’m not sure that the same would hold true there.

    Present stepdad recently celebrated his 80th birthday.

  3. Well…she’s a big Ol’Sweet Gal, she will do what is best, I hope.
    My friend Bob C. lives in the KC area, and by the first of March, he and his wife are so fed up with snow, ice, and freezing temps, they spend the whole month near Ft. Lauderdale.
    I’ve experienced those Kansas winters(and summers), and they is rough!

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