Laissez-Faire Lawn Care

My attitude towards branches, leaves, etc. that fall out of the trees in the yard is more or less laissez-faire. If the branch falls out of the tree, and the leaves fall out of the tree, then let them lie under the tree to nuture the tree. I believe in recycling nutrients. Or something. Just so I don’t have to waste my weekend sweating over it and can spend it on something much more worthwhile, like admiring how superior the grandchildren are in comparison to their parents.

Luckily, I live in a rural area so while I may be judged by the people that are anal-retentive about lawn care to the point that if the grass is 1/4 inch above optimal eye appeal height, they’re out there with the power equipment whacking it into submission, there are no Homeowners Associations to pummel me into compliance with the lawn care rules and regulations of civilized folk.

“What in the world is that huge pile of limbs in your front yard?”

“Squirrel habitat.”


“Yeah, I’m all about nurturing the small mammals and giving them safe houses to duck into in case of a hawk attack.”

“Uh huh.”

Unfortunately, the tidy German portion of my DNA has temporarily defeated the more easygoing French and American Indian portions of my DNA and stuffed it into the closet, which is why I’m out raking up branches and old dog toys and tidying up the yard.

I just wish that that tidy DNA would come out in the winter instead of the hot, humid Florida summer.

Maybe it isn’t so much the tidy DNA as procrastination on seeking new employment. Hunh. That French DNA is some powerful stuff.

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