Tales from Kindergarten and First Grade

“Jeeeeeesus Christ, this is BULLshit!” said the cute little kindergarten boy with big brown eyes and a truculent expression. Papers and crayons had just been passed out to color circles in either red or blue, depending on the colors of the circles above the blank circles, the purpose of which is to work on developing pattern recognition and not to torture little kindergarten boys.

So far this week, I have been kicked, hit, spit at, had green snot sneezed all over me, had shoes thrown at me, and told how much I am hated. I’ve also been hugged, kissed, and told “I love you!” and, a high point, have not (yet) been thrown up on or had to change poopy pants. (These are developmentally delayed children; one is not “potty” trained.)

After explaining to the cute little kindergarten boy that first we do our work, then we play, he muttered something that sounded suspiciously like “ain’t no bitch gonna tell ME what to do”.

Sigh. It’s gonna be a loooooong year.


Sercan Ondem

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